Here’s the Truth (and I barely ever go off on someone’s life): 

I am a college senior about to graduate with about 30,000 dollars in debt.

I pay for most of my living expenses (my mother so kindly pays for my rent) by working 15 hours a week (because I can’t get another job and my boss doesn’t have more hours for me)

I chose a moderately priced, in-state public university and started saving money when I was sixteen (and just spent it all on my last overdue tuition bill)

I got FABULOUS grades in high school and got two scholarships, which only covered my first year of college. 

I have a 3.something. Too busy to check it

I live comfortable in a cheap apartment and know I can’t have everything I want. I don’t eat out every day or even once a month. I have no credit card, new car, iPad, or smartphone—and I’m perfectly okay with that.

Since I have debt, I can place my blame where I see fit. And no, I didn’t make a bad decision because all the debt is due to college. Debt has started to become a rite of passage and most people are too busy paying off college to enjoy it or do their best.

I live below my means and CAN’T save for the future because I’m spending every single extra cent on my tuition and bills. 

I don’t expect anything to be handed to me and I will continue to work my ass off for everything I have. 

But this is not how it’s supposed to work. I’m 22 with thousands of dollars of debt in only 3 years (because I did go to community college there)

I am part of the 99% and it was NOT my decision.

I’m only taking 15 credits. I’m taking ATMS 120 which is supposed to be a super easy, super fun class. There’s also a beginning level language class in there… I really don’t understand why this semester is so hard…

… Except that I haven’t started reading my books for my Human Rights class and I’m very behind on my Criminology class and I’m barely making the readings and film for my Brazilian Trans Lit and Film class. I haven’t done any of the quizzes for Portuguese either, so I guess I’m behind on that too. 

It’s like a circus in my backpack, in my brain, and in my planner. 

To add salt to the wound, I got a collection call from the energy people and my less than ideal security deposit from my old apartment. Then a week ago when they put another financial hold (on top of my first financial hold) on my account. Mmmm delicious. 

but I bought a pair of pumas today, so I’m pretty excited for when they get here in 5-7 days. :) and my jeans… which should by now be getting here from 4-6 days now :) and the paycheck that I should be getting on Monday which will then probably immediately go into the school :)… :( … but I’m buying my cardigan and a bottle of alcohol before that happens.

This is a great, stressful start. 

not in my bank.

I owe the school 3,000 dollas and they won’t even let me access anything but my bill online. I suppose that’s a good thing though, since I really need a copy of that bill to get a loan. 

my school so mean. :P

there’s a cap on how much you can take out on loan for your undergrad.

well SHIT.

my friend found this out the hard way. I’m scared I’m next (you know, because I have so many scholarships and so many grants and aid it’s not even funny yo~)

FML.

I really don’t need to be flat out broke when I start my senior year. I mean, really?

WHAT IS THE CAP DAMMIT?!

FUCK

STOP BEING SO HARD

I’m a political science major. A senior, at that. I’m not new at this whole scene, especially with international relations. THIS IS JUST BLASPHEMY. YOU’RE AN INTRO CLASS THAT I SHOULD HAVE TAKEN TWO YEARS AGO.

XOX><

That was the note my roommate left on the dry erase board. 

I’m sorry, what? Use my own cup? If I remember correctly, none of you guys contributed AT ALL to the collection of dishes, so really they’re MY cups. Ehf that “use your own cup”. What doe she even mean anyways? That nasty ass cup that she defrosts her fish in? I’ll pass, thanks. 

I didn’t even use her damn cup, but she left it out in the counter for all the world to see (its nastiness) so I put it in the sink for when a prospective subleasee would visit. So sue me. I wanted to give the appearance that we didn’t live in a complete shithole.

And if it was the other roommate… wtf? That makes even less sense! It had to be the girl. Ugh. Use your own cup— THIS IS MY APARTMENT. Bitches can shut up.

staring at some clouds.

in the comfy leather chairs by by the window.

my computer screen is at the brightest setting because the sun is shining on it (even though it’s really freaking cloudy) and I have no idea how to close these blinds (not that I would want to regardless).

avoiding the research paper from hell.

feels kinda good right now, but the Friday feeling definitely isn’t going to last.

we’ve never had a great relationship. I am aware of this.

first I forget you, my native language, and then you play hard to get.

but I thought we were above this type of behavior. I thought were were willing to make it work and overcome the obstacles of the inability to spell, pronounce, or make sense. The Spanish teachers from Spain with their vosotros… the creepy TAs with their creeping… we started from the ground up. We’ve gone so far and made so much progress.

WHY ARE YOU DESTROYING ME NOW?

WHERE ARE MY NATURAL INSTINCTS THAT SAY “HEY THAT’S WRONG. THIS ONE IS RIGHT.”????? WHERE ARE YOU INSTINCTS?

as it stands, I’m failing in two places with this exam (valorativas and apparently posesivos)

WTF? Valuations and Possessive particles/articles?

Goodbye bed, not tonight

Hello computer, new best friend

Ehf you HIST 281 paper, new enemy

Love you chocolate, pure warmth

Hey sexy coffee, my motivation

Wat up moon, we tight tonight

I really need to start reading and stop putting off these horrible papers.

mad love for this girl

:)

@ ACES Library

Now, I live on a college campus. We have a decent bus system. I had to do groceries. Seriously. All I had was bread and pasta sauce.

So, I woke up at 11 and decided to get something to eat i.e. groceries.

So, here is the easiest walmart to get to:

It required 2 bus transactions. I had to run two blocks to catch the bus right on time. Then waited at the mall for about 15 minutes to catch the orange, which took forever to get to walmart. The bus stop is on the opposite side of the entrance.

Everything was fine. Until I had to carry my groceries. I haven’t done groceries taking a bus in years, and I didn’t have a backpack available. So… I was in hell. Those two bus transfers were horrible and terrible. I had reduced the bags from 8 to 6, but there were still two 2-liters of ginger ale and a gallon of milk. And just various SHIT. I’m not a physically active or… able person. I have noodle arms. 

I have a bruise on both of my hands, one of which can’t stop stinging. The bag tried to cut into my skin… thank god it’s so thick, because… I would be bleeding. 

All the purple and pink. It looks worse in real life.

UGHHHHH. Never doing this again. Because I had to walk BACK from the bus stop to my apartment and open doors and stuff.

It was so rough. And people kept looking at me. 

Thank god I bought the Starbucks Caramel Macchiato because it was SOOOO needed. I felt horrible, no one was there to help me, it’s Dad’s weekend, so even if they were answering theirs phones, then they would be with daddy dearest. It sucks.

I’m just bitching and moaning and I would be over it by now if it weren’t for the everlasting pain in my hands.

I will kick your ass today.

I will get an A.

I am wearing my lucky underwear and favorite new shirt.

I have studied.

I have planned.

I have showered.

I’m ready for you. 

I’m watching Grey’s Anatomy

Season 1

oh boy

uh oh